I had my cursor in the box where I'm supposed to put the title and nothing would come to me. First of all, did I want to address my very long absence or not--to tell the truth, I'm getting tired of telling people why I haven't written in so long and I suspect you're just as tired of hearing about it. So, if I didn't want to make excuses, what did I want to call what I want to write about--ah, actually, knowing what I want to write about might be a good thing to know first. You can see where this is going--no clue! As I was sitting there letting all these things slide through my brain, the line from a song I don't remember the name of came to me and it was perfect. Suddenly I had not only the title of the blog, I knew where I was going to start writing--once I got past telling you about the title of the blog :-). By the way, I remembered what it came from--the theme from Star Trek: Enterprise.
My growth process is getting me from there to here as well and even though it seems like it's taking a long time, I remember how long it took to get where I was a couple of years ago and how relatively short a time period it took to get so much further.
My current "crisis" is going to Los Angeles to meet my virtual co-workers and my Virtual Assistant buddy. I decided this would be a good time to start being concerned about how people might judge me because of my appearance.
There are two things to be said about that:
- These are my friends and they like me for who I am, not how I look, and
- If they don't, it's their problem, not mine.
The reality is, that's not how it feels right now. As a result, I have taken steps to make sure I make the best impression I can make. Of course I'll be getting a haircut and much facial waxing. I also bought bras that were custom fitted and DON'T have underwires. (What a fabulous experience that was!) I also ordered a pattern of slacks and an amazing, flowing jacket that is short in the front and long in the back that has several different ways it can be worn--impossible to explain but very cool looking.
I've found a seamstress who can make clothing for me at a reasonable cost and she told me she could make the outfit in a week. I ordered the pattern and knew I would have well over a week for her to finish it. I bought the fabric and notions last night (I won't even tell you how much I spent for it) and took it all over to her only to find out she was going to be leaving on Monday to be on vacation for a month! What the.....?
I went back to the fabric store and asked if they knew of anyone else who could make it for me. They gave me one card of someone and the location of another. I immediately drove to the one for which I had the location. She had just recovered from surgery and had too much work to catch up with to do anything else right now. I called the number for the other one and left a message with a child. I love children. I don't trust their ability to take a readable message and, if they do that, to actually deliver it. When I hadn't heard from her by afternoon today, I called again. This time I left a message on a machine. I was much more confident I would get a return call.
Between the time I left the message and the time I heard back from her, I decided I was going to have the outfit come hell or high water! I do know how to sew, after all. I was just farming it out because my fibromyalgia makes it very challenging for me to do a whole lot more than work and I've been doing a whole lot more than work lately. I still knew I really could do this if I put my mind to it (and as much energy as I could muster).
It was truly a liberating feeling to take control of this whole thing.
I didn't tell you how this all came about. I was going to do that in this post but I started typing and this is what came out. I'm hopeful I'll be writing more in the coming weeks, though it's probably best not to have that expectation, and I can tell you all about what's been going on in my life and how it's affecting my journey.
Until next time...